What Coming Out Taught Me About Myself
Josh Friedburg is proud of his coming out, but also realized he needed to make some changes in his own mind. I came out in front of a lot people because I felt I had something to say. I was in a safe...
View Article6 Moments When Music Made My Life Better
Embed from Getty Images I am a passionate music fan, historian, and sometime radio DJ. But the most meaningful music moments in my life are often ones involving me creating and performing music as a...
View ArticleOn Dancing While White and Disabled
— I am a white, disabled nerd, and dancing has rarely been my forte. I remember liking to dance a random assortment of frantic foot motions at weddings while I was in middle school—and relishing the...
View ArticleOn Crying and Music
— I’m not going to lie: I’ve cried a lot in my lifetime. Crying has helped me cope with a lot of pain. But I haven’t cried much in a long time. I get choked up more than a lot of men do, but rarely...
View ArticleI Used to Feel Ashamed of My Autism: Here’s What I Feel Now
— When it comes to my life, the part of my identity that I feel the strongest attachment to is my love of music. I couldn’t have learned so much about music history without Autism. I can name a musical...
View ArticleMy Autistic Memory and Compassion are My Superpowers
Embed from Getty Images — This isn’t the first Good Men Project article where I’ve mentioned my memory, that I can recall a musical event if you name any year from 1909 to today. Really, try me; I...
View Article30 Ways That I’m Growing as an Autistic Gay Man at age 30
Embed from Getty Images — I was born August 8, 1988 (8-8-88), which, during my childhood, was a source of pride. It was good luck, for sure, but that doesn’t mean my life has always been easy. I did...
View ArticleHow I Define Success
— “What is success? To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends;...
View ArticleOn Dating Being Gay, Autistic, and Alcohol-Free
I’m gay, I’m Autistic, and I don’t drink or do drugs. Needless to say, dating has never been easy for me. Being super-literal and thus having trouble with sarcasm, among other qualities of my Autism,...
View ArticleHow a Friend’s Death Changed Everything Between Us
Death shouldn’t be what it takes to reassess a friendship, but sometimes, that’s what it takes. In 2015, I turned 27, the age that a number of famous musicians, including Jimi Hendrix, Kurt Cobain, and...
View ArticleI Pace Therefore I Am (Anxious)
Anxiety Why do you always get the best of me? I’m out here living in a fantasy I can’t enjoy a goddamn thing —Jason Isbell, “Anxiety” Chronic anxiety is no joke. I sometimes wonder if patriarchal,...
View ArticleThree Great Songs About Unusually Great Men
So many songs represent men negatively: as unavailable, distant, absent, cheating, lying, or abusive. And given the history of patriarchy in the U.S. and around the world, such representations of men...
View ArticleOn Apologies: Accountability vs. Control
I’m a chronic apologizer. I sometimes say, “I’m sorry” as a reflex. It’s a great way to try to control other people’s reactions. That doesn’t mean it actually works, though, or that it’s worth doing in...
View ArticleJust a Little Unwell? On the Good and Bad Parts of a Manic Episode
I’m not crazy, I’m just a little unwell I know right now you can’t tell But stay awhile and maybe then you’ll see A different side of me –from “Unwell” by Matchbox 20 Matchbox 20’s early 2000s hit...
View ArticleWhat Toni Morrison Made Me See as a White Person
Like many, I have been greatly impacted by the work of Toni Morrison, whose recent death got me thinking about not only her work’s meaning for marginalized groups, including African Americans and/or...
View ArticleMy Overweight, Disabled Body Image
I’ve been thinking a lot about the beauty standards of the dominant culture since Toni Morrison died. In her first novel, The Bluest Eye, Morrison paints a picture of how such standards affect girls...
View ArticleWhy I Am a Proud Mama’s Boy
As long as I have been alive, there has always a stigma around being a so-called “mama’s boy.” But anyone who takes issue with someone like that never met me and my mother. I’m Autistic and growing up,...
View ArticleOn Language That Oppresses—and Language That Doesn’t
There’s a useful distinction that many marginalized people have made for centuries that many privileged people don’t understand: the difference between simple prejudice and institutionalized hate, or...
View ArticleThe Straight Pride Parade, All Lives Matter, and Men’s Rights Activism: Really?
I’ve had trouble processing the news recently, but a few stories have caught my attention. Seeing posts on Boston’s “straight pride parade” is awfully depressing, yet unsurprising. In the U.S., many...
View ArticleMaybe I’ll Never Yell Again?
I’ve always been very sensitive because of my Autism. Over the years, I have grown a thicker skin in relation to others’ hurtful comments, but my hypersensitivity on the inside has never disappeared....
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